Cost
by Rinpa
Summary: Naruto has grown into a fine hokage.  His wisdom is the sort that's frequently indistinguishable from idiocy, but with Shikamaru by his side to temper his idealism, Konoha is in good hands.  There's no need—no place—for Kakashi anymore.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishi.

Cost

The office was silent. The hokage sat behind his desk, dumb-struck. The only parts of him capable of movement were his brilliant blue eyes, which were growing slowly wider and wider.

At last, he came to himself a little, shook himself like a dog after a swim, and laughed. "That's not funny, Kakashi-sensei." It really wasn't. His laugh had been weak, and his hands clutched the edge of the table in a white knuckled grip.

"I'm being completely serious, Naruto."

And despite Kakashi's careless pose and the fact that his one visible eye was arched in a smile, Naruto knew it was true. His eyes fell to the desk. He stared hard at it for a while, then lifted his gaze to his old teacher's face again. "There's no way I can let you do that, Kakashi-sensei."

The edge in his rough tenor dragged across the silence like a saw-tooth blade. Everyone's heart beat a little quicker as they were thrown back, for a moment, into memories of the time when the Kyuubi's chakra could run wild. But Naruto was the Hokage now, a (relatively) steady man of thirty two. It was unthinkable that such a thing could happen now, and everyone breathed easy again.

Naruto was completely unaware of all this. His eyes were fixed solely on Kakashi. The latter met his stare with a bland, almost bored, expression. "Ohh? And why not?"

Naruto blinked and scowled. "What do you MEAN _'why not'_!"

"I mean, Naruto," Kakashi explained patiently, "that you have to send someone, and it might as well be me."

"Kakashi-sensei! That's…" Naruto turned to his strategic advisor for support.

Shikamaru, looking very much as though he'd rather be somewhere else, sighed and shook his head. "Kakashi-sensei's right, Naruto. Someone's gotta go, and looking at the situation logically, Kakashi's our best option. He's the only man we can spare that actually has a hope of pulling this off."

There was something very, very, _wrong _about what Shikamaru was saying.

'The only man that we could spare.'

Kakashi-sensei… a spare?

Naruto felt hot, bubbling outrage building in his stomach.

He glared fiercely at Shikamaru. The ninja to either side quailed. "There's gotta be some other way! I can't send Kakashi-sensei to die!" he growled.

Shikamaru held his ground, even under the blistering blue heat of his hokage's gaze. He simply crossed his arms and gave a deliberate shake of the head. There was no mistake. Glimmers of a thousand possible plans shot through his head, but there was no mistake. This was the one that carried the least risk for Konoha, at the least cost. Kakashi, starting to slow down in the latter half of his 40s, and never having been particularly well endowed with chakra to begin with, had become expendable, …looking at the situation logically.

Clearly Naruto wasn't prepared to accept that reality, though. If anything, he was taking this much harder than expected. His face was darkening, and his voice carried the feral edge of a cornered animal. "_Shikamaru, teme_…"

There wasn't going to be anything that Shikamaru could say to convince Naruto. If someone were to convince him, it would have to be… He glanced at Kakashi. Naruto's old sensei caught his eye, and Shikamaru could see that he understood what he was asking. The heavy lid slid closed over Kakashi's eye, and his shoulders drooped as he gave in to a momentary expression of utter exhaustion. He pulled himself together, pushed off the wall he'd been lounging against, and stepped up to stand straight across the desk from his former student.

"Rokudaime."

Naruto transferred his glare from Shikamaru to the man standing in front of him, not registering that Kakashi had called him by his title rather than his name. He opened his mouth to object to whatever Kakashi was about to say, but he stopped dead at the cold, distant look in his teacher's eye. Kakashi had never looked at him like that before, not even on that first real mission, when Naruto had been too scared to move. "Rokudaime Hokage. Your village is in danger of being destroyed. Your military advisor is telling you that sacrificing me is the surest way to protect it. I'm telling you that I'm willing. What are you waiting for? Are you going to disregard you advisor's council, disrespect my resolve, and put your ideals over the lives of the people you swore to protect?"

He stopped to watch his student's reaction. Naruto had started guiltily when Kakashi mentioned ideals. For a moment he looked almost lost, and Kakashi couldn't help relenting a little.

He sighed, leaned over the desk, and ruffled the hokage's hair. It was a silly thing to do to a thirty-two year old man, but it was nostalgic to see Naruto looking—and acting—more like the kid he'd first met 20 years ago, than the man who'd been Kakashi's own greatly admired teacher. His body slipped unconsciously into the old habit. He paused with his hand still resting on the beloved yellow head.

He found himself reluctant to break that contact. He'd been saying that his era was over for almost as long as he'd known the kid, but now it was really true. Present behavior not-withstanding, Naruto had grown into a fine hokage. He was absurdly powerful. He was absurdly kind. He had won the complete confidence of the people of Konoha, and their affection as well. His wisdom was the sort that was frequently indistinguishable from idiocy, but with Shikamaru by his side to temper his idealism, Konoha was in good hands. There was no need—no place—for Kakashi anymore.

He withdrew his hand from Naruto's head, shoved it into his pocket, and smiled. "Naruto. This is something I want to do."

Naruto had clearly been distracted by his own thoughts. He hadn't even noticed Kakashi's touch. Now, however, his eyes snapped back into focus on Kakashi's face.

"…Something you _want_?" he repeated incredulously.

"That's right, Naruto."

Astonished blue eyes searched Kakashi's face, and finding nothing there, fell to rest on the hands still clenched on the edge of the desk.

"Shikamaru. Just think it over one more time, OK? Isn't there something else we can do?" His voice was still rough, but there was no more bite to it. It just sounded strained.

Shikamaru grimaced. "I've_ been_ thinking it over. Look. I don't want to send somebody…" Shikamaru stopped as he caught a strange flinching motion of the hokage's eyes at the word "somebody." He filed the odd reaction away and continued on. "I don't want to send somebody on a suicide mission either, but that's the only plan I can think of with acceptable risks for Konoha."

"Alright, I get it." The hokage leaned forward to prop his elbows on his desk. He lowered his face into his hands and rubbed his temples. "Then there's nothing more I can say. We'll go ahead with your plan. Tomorrow at 0600 we'll meet here again to discuss the details. Dismissed."

People began to file out of the office. Kakashi lingered a little while in front of the hokage's desk, but Naruto didn't look up, and he, too, turned and shuffled away. Shikamaru had been one of the first to start towards the door, but seeing Naruto refusing to look at his teacher, he thought better of it. He leaned up against a wall and waited until everyone else was gone.

"Naruto…"

Naruto jumped in surprise and looked wildly around. "Shikamaru!" He managed a wobbly grin. "Don't scare me like that. I thought everyone'd left…"

"Ah, my bad. Naruto, about Kakashi…"

"Sorry, Shikamaru," the hokage interrupted. He was smiling, but his face was tired and drawn.

Shikamaru winced inwardly. Seriously, who did he think he was fooling with that expression?

"Sorry, but could you just leave me alone for a while?"

Shikamaru couldn't argue with that. "… Alright, Naruto." He shuffled to the door. "See you at the meeting tomorrow."

It had begun to drizzle outside. Shikamaru stopped at the bottom of the town hall stairs, and dug something out of his pocket. He fingered the little lighter, flipped it open, closed, and open again, lighted it briefly, snapped it shut, and ran his thumb over the lid. He tilted his head back and stared up into the leaden sky.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishi.

Cost

"Minato-sensei…" was Kakashi's first sleepy thought when he opened his door. But no, Minato had been dead for over thirty years. The handsome blond with the startling blue eyes and the clean-cut features wasn't Sensei, but his son. Kakashi's own student. Even after all these years, he hadn't quite wrapped his head around the idea. And now, he realized, he never would. Tomorrow, maybe the day after, if he was lucky, he would die.

He rubbed a hand over his tired eyes. "What is it, Naruto? Can't you leave an old man to sleep in peace?"

"That again, Kakashi-sensei! Stop calling yourself an old man!" Naruto's face scrunched into a frown, ruining the resemblance to Minato, but sparking another memory in its place. Obito. Kakashi smiled at the old, old ache that stirred at the thought of him. Very old. Obito had been gone even longer than Minato-sensei.

"I _am_ old, Naruto."

Naruto stared up into his teacher's face. Twenty years, he thought with a twinge of annoyance, and Kakashi-sensei was still taller than him. But Naruto's attention was soon drawn another way. The cold white light of the moon cast every detail of Kakashi's face into relief, and sure enough, he could see the fine lines fanning out from the corners of his teacher's eyes. How long had they been there? He reached up to touch them. Kakashi's skin was cool and dry. He ran his fingers down the pale cheek and hooked them under the edge of the mask that his teacher was _still_ wearing, despite being woken in the middle of the night.

"Hold on, Naruto, what are you…" Kakashi jerked his head away reflexively, but the motion only served to help Naruto pull away the mask. Kakashi tried to take a step back, but Naruto took his teacher's head firmly in both hands, arresting his movement. He might still be shorter, but at least now he was stronger. He pulled his teacher's face a little closer, and studied it intently. Shifting his grip a little, he ran a thumb over the lines of laughter and worry etched around the thin, white lips.

So what. Maybe his teacher wasn't young anymore, but he'd never seen this face any other way, and he personally couldn't imagine anything more beautiful.

That was why he was here.

He'd realized, just today, that he loved this man.

Kakashi's hands found his shoulders, and Naruto let himself be pushed back a pace. Kakashi didn't let go, as if not quite sure what his student might pull if given the chance. "Naruto." His voice was calm. He wasn't out of his depth just yet. "What's this all about?"

Naruto continued to examine the face he'd always wanted to see. They'd all been curious, he, Sasuke, and Sakura. He half smiled, remembering some of the crazy things they'd done trying to uncover the mystery behind the mask. Sasuke and Sakura had died before fulfilling that particular ambition.

He really had loved Sakura. There wasn't a lot he wouldn't have done for her. Even after he realized there was someone he loved even more, he'd never forgotten what she'd been to him.

He really had loved Sasuke. He'd realized _that_ when Sakura offered to absolve him of the promise he'd made to bring Sasuke back to her. In the face of giving up on Sasuke, even the offer of Sakura's long-wished-for love had left him feeling cold and empty.

He really had loved both of them, and he'd never really get over the loss of them, but…

After losing Sakura and Sasuke, all that was left of the old Team 7 was Kakashi and himself, and neither of them had ever been able to let that bond go. Kakashi wasn't an easy person to get close to, but after all these years, Naruto realized that he really had fallen in love with _him_, too.

He just hadn't realized it until _now_, when he was supposed to send Kakashi out on a mission that would mean his certain death. Shikamaru had told him he had to do it. _Kakashi _had told him he had to do it. Naruto _knew_ that he had to do it—sort of, on some level—and had spent all evening and half the night trying to bend the rest of his mind to the idea. He'd realized, though, that there was one question he really needed the answer to before he could even begin to make a decision.

"Kakashi-sensei." Naruto locked eyes with his teacher. "You told me that this mission is something you _want_ to do. _Why_?"

Kakashi let go of Naruto's shoulders. He crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame. He eyed his student warily. "I'm a shinobi of Konoha. What's so strange about wanting to give my life to protect it?"

Naruto's jaw tightened. His blue eyes narrowed as he stared hard into Kakashi's impassive face. "What's so strange?" His hand sliced the space between them in a sweeping gesture of rejection. "You're asking me what's so strange? We've been through all of this before. Don't tell me you forgot about the time Tsunade-baa-chan let you go off alone on a suicide mission. After I saved your ass, I told you that you guys had it all wrong, and you _agreed_. You're asking me—asking _Konoha_ –to become the worst kind of trash. So I'm asking you, what's changed since then that you would ask me to do that?"

Kakashi sighed. "You're really going to make me say it, eh Naruto." He smiled. It was a lot easier, Naruto realized, to read Kakashi with his face uncovered, and he almost regretted pulling down the mask. Kakashi's tone was light and careless, but the lines at the corners of his mouth had deepened in an expression that looked more like pain than the intended smile, and he looked haggard. Part of Naruto wanted to draw back, not to put any more pressure on Kakashi, not to hurt him any more, but… he _needed_ an answer to his question. He wasn't even sure why himself. His gut just told him that this was _important_, and that there was no way he could let Kakashi go without getting to the bottom of it.

"Yeah," he growled, "I am. So hurry up and spit it out, Kakashi-sensei."

"…What's changed, huh." Kakashi closed his eyes and ran a hand through his hair. Again he smiled, and again Naruto immediately recognized the smile as a fake. "I'm content to end my life now. Instead of sacrificing a comrade, think of it as giving an old soldier one last chance to make himself useful, hmm? Let's face it; I'm not needed anymore, and I'm too old a dog to learn new..."

Kakashi's appeal was cut off as a man-sized missile wrapped in searing hot chakra slammed into him. His eyes snapped open as his back to hit the floor with a jarring thud, and the back of his head cracked against the bare wooden planks of his front hallway. He didn't have time to worry about bumps and bruises, though. Naruto was crouched over him, eyes glinting red and blackened lips stretched back over barred teeth. Clawed fingers dug into his shoulders, and the orange sheath of chakra that was beginning to bubble up from Naruto's skin burned.

"Don't fuck with me, Kakashi-sensei," the wild creature's raw, grating voice snarled down to him.

…..

And no, this is not the end either, in case you were wondering. Working on it, but it's not quite there, and I thought this was a nice cheerful line at which to leave you for the moment. XD Endless thanks to the people who've reviewed so far.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishi.

Cost

Kyuubi. The demon fox cloak. After all these years, for Naruto to lose control…

But now wasn't the time to lie around being surprised.

What he ought to be doing instead, however, Kakashi wasn't entirely sure. Naruto's weight on his shoulders kept him firmly pinned to the ground. Any attempt to physically dislodge the man would mean more contact with the chakra cloak, and more burns. His arms were more or less free to move; he could make seals, and a well chosen jutsu might give him a chance to get back on his feet. It would have to be a strong one, though. Nothing less than raikiri would have any effect on Naruto in this state, and that was problematic. He didn't understand what Naruto was thinking, and couldn't predict how he might react. Supposing he became even more enraged? Escaping his present predicament would only be buying him a little more time. He was no match for Naruto, and if the fight continued he would unquestionably come out of it worse off. And that wasn't the worst that could happen. He was afraid that Naruto might not respond to the attack at all. What if, in this strange mood of his, he just sat there and took a blast from raikiri head on? How could Kakashi risk that? He decided that an attack was out of the question. That left only one, very slender hope.

Kakashi tuned out the scorching pain in his shoulders and stared straight up into Naruto's face. Red eyes met, and held.

"Naruto. Snap out of it."

For a tense moment, nothing changed. Then the angry chakra began to dissipate. The pressure on Kakashi's shoulders eased as Naruto sat back. The young man closed his eyes, and scrubbed away the tears coursing down his face with a sleeve. Kakashi was almost as surprised to find his student crying as anything else. Certainly, Naruto had a tendency to get personally wrapped up in everybody's problems, but he hadn't acted like _this_ since his teens.

Naruto dropped his hand and opened his eyes again. They were the normal bright blue, if a little bloodshot, and Kakashi breathed out a sigh of relief. The next thing he knew, a fist was plowing into the side of his face. He grunted and blinked away the sparking light in the back of his eyes before rolling his head gingerly back to its original position. Naruto was still sitting on him, one hand clenched around a fist full of his shirt, the other balled and hovering in the air, ready to strike again if need be.

"Never say that again, Kakashi-sensei. You're still needed. I need you."

Kakashi considered the poised first, and then the angry passion in his student's eyes. "Naruto," he began, trying to inject as much soothing calmness into his voice as was possible with a potentially berserk young man sitting on his chest. "You don't need me anymore. There are dozens of ninja stronger than I am, and you've got the smartest man I've ever met to advise you."

Kakashi half expected Naruto to hit him again, but he just shook his head violently. "_You_ would never tell me to sacrifice someone. Well,… someone other than yourself, anyway."

Kakashi paused to think. Was that true? Probably. Naruto was so much like Obito. There were times when he'd come close to forgetting the words Obito had said to him all those years ago, but looking at Naruto's determined face always brought them clearly to mind. "Guys who break the rules are called trash. But guys who don't take care of their comrades are even worse trash." So no. He never had been able to tell this kid-become-man to sacrifice someone. All the more reason to leave Naruto in the care of Shikamaru, who wasn't afraid of confronting his Hokage with unpalatable realities.

Kakashi half sighed, half groaned to himself. "What a great teacher I turned out to be. Two students dead and the last glued to a pie-in-the-sky ideal."

This remark was greeted with silence. Naruto's grip on the front of Kakashi's shirt tightened, but his other hand wavered, and fell to his side. "Kakashi-sensei,… to… um… to be honest,… ideals… I couldn't care less right now."

Kakashi raised an eye brow. "Alright… Just what have what have we been arguing about, then?"

Naruto had turned his head and was grimacing at a spot on the floor a little to Kakashi's right. "It _should_ be about ideals. It should be, but… but frankly I hadn't even thought about any of that until you mentioned it at the meeting, and when you did, I realized the only thing in my mind was… It wasn't _someone _that I didn't want to sacrifice, it was… I don't need you just for your advice, Kakashi-sensei, I, uh… I _can't_ send you to die. I can't send you to die because I… I, uh… love you." Having finally managed to get out what he wanted to say, Naruto squeezed his eyes shut, as if waiting for a blow.

"E-ehhhh?" was all Kakashi could manage. His voice cracked halfway through and ended an octave higher than it began.

Silence stretched between them, and finally Naruto opened one eye. "Come on, Kakashi-sensei," he whined, "Please don't make me say that again. It's embarrassing." He frowned and flushed.

"Alright, but I thought I heard… Did you really say… ah…" Kakashi found that he couldn't muster the courage to repeat the words either.

"Can I, um…" Naruto began to list tentatively forward. "Would it be alright if I… um… k-kissed you?"

Kakashi stared up at his student, completely at a loss. "Naruto. I'm an _old man_."

That stoked Naruto's anger once again. He grabbed Kakashi by the shoulders, heedless of the burns, and shook him. Kakashi grimaced as his abused head knocked against the floor. "What's the _matter_ with you? You're only 47!"

"48," Kakashi grumbled, somewhat unwisely, through the onslaught.

"Whatever! You've still got half your life left to live, and I'll be damned if I let you throw it away!"

"Naruto… if you keep this up, you might just finish me off on the spot." Kakashi winced and reached up to tap the hands that pinioned his shoulders. "That really hurts, you know."

Naruto let go immediately, and for the first time noticed the holes burned in Kakashi's shirt, and the scalded flesh beneath. He stared, horrified. Suddenly becoming aware that he was still sitting on his teacher as well, he hastily scrambled to his feet and backed away.

Kakashi sighed, and started to pick himself up with geriatric slowness. "Say what you will, Naruto," he grumbled, as the other bumps and bangs he'd accumulated began to make themselves heard, "but people my age don't recover as fast as they used to. You've got to treat us with a little more care, eh?"

Naruto instantly moved to help his teacher to his feet. "Kakashi-sensei, I'm sorry!" he groaned miserably, "I didn't mean to! I wasn't thinking…"

"It's fine, I was joking." Kakashi, moved to clap his contrite student on the shoulder, but immediately thought better of it. Now that the adrenaline was fading away, his burns were beginning to hurt like hell. Even that slight movement of his arm had brought on a wave of pain that made him weak at the knees. "Maa… If you want to make it up to me, though, I won't stop you." The thought of bandaging himself, with all the reaching and stretching involved, was very off putting. "You can start by helping me treat these burns." Naruto was, of course, willing to do whatever he asked. "Follow me, then. I've got a medical pack under the bed." He shuffled off down the hallway, Naruto trailing at his heels like a whipped dog.

…..

Thanks again to the people who were good enough to review, double thanks to the people who were good enough to review TWICE (XD very happy), and thank you as well to everyone who's stuck with the story even though I've been teasing you with short chapters. Until next time.


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishi.

Cost

When they reached the bedroom, Kakashi was suffered to do nothing besides sit quietly on the edge of the bed while Naruto rustled around beneath it for the medical kit and sorted through the supplies it contained. He straightened up with a roll of bandages in one hand and a jar of salve in the other. He stared at Kakashi's shoulders. A blush spread over his cheeks, and he turned away. "I guess… the shirt needs to come off."

Kakashi eyed his student. It might be better, in light of Naruto's recent confession, not to involve him in an activity that involved the removal of clothing. It would be kinder, at any rate. But, Kakashi's burns were killing him, and he was rapidly becoming convinced that if he tried to bandage himself, he'd simply pass out from the pain. He didn't like his chances hobbling to the hospital, either.

"I guess you're right," he answered lightly.

Naruto's blush deepened. "Right. Um. Put your arms over your head."

Kakashi thought about it for a split second. "No thanks. That would hurt rather a lot. Can't you just cut the shirt off?" He smiled slightly. "You've already burnt holes in it…"

"Oh. Right. Sorry Kakashi-sensei, I wasn't thi…"

"Thinking. I know." Naruto looked more miserable than ever, and Kakashi regretted his comment. "_Now_ who's the one not thinking?" he reproached himself silently. He wanted to apologize to Naruto, to reach out and give him a reassuring touch, but Naruto was already cutting away at the cuff of one sleeve with the little scissors included in the medical pack. Besides. Reaching out would hurt.

He settled for watching Naruto as he worked, and pretending not to notice his long pause and conspicuous swallow as the last of Kakashi's shirt fell away. Naruto shook his head and continued bravely on with his task, inexpertly dabbing salve onto the burns. For a while, Kakashi was distracted by the pain of Naruto's clumsy fingers prodding the raw wounds. Naruto was _trying_ to be careful, but his specialty had always been breaking things, not fixing them.

When the ordeal was finally over and Naruto had moved on to the less painful process of wrapping him up, Kakashi was free to think again. He found there was a lot to think about; first and foremost, what to do about the fact that Naruto was in love with him.

Well… there was no question that he loved Naruto. He'd been living largely for Naruto's sake since the deaths of Sasuke and Sakura… No, if he was completely honest with himself, Naruto had been the unmistakable center of his life even before then, and that had been part of the problem. If he'd just tried harder with Sasuke… If he'd just paid more attention to Sakura… But all that was in the past now. For better or worse, Naruto was all he had, and had been for a very long time.

What he wasn't sure of, was what _kind_ of love he felt for his student. It had always been absurd to think of romantic love between them, so naturally he'd never thought about it. And there had been no need. There was always something else to tie them together, some other reason to devote himself to Naruto's care. He was Minato's son. He was the village's ultimate weapon. He was the village's ticking time bomb. He was a student. He was a young, inexperienced Hokage with young, inexperienced advisors.

But Naruto was a 32 year old man, now, and he'd outgrown all those reasons. He didn't need the kind of care Kakashi had been giving him anymore. What he needed now, apparently, was to care for someone else… as a lover. It had never once occurred to Kakashi that _he_ could be that person, but… _why not_?

Why not? Because he was about to be dead.

He'd lost sight of that fact in the shock of Naruto's confession, but he remembered it now, and nothing had changed. He still couldn't allow Konoha to be destroyed, and he certainly couldn't allow Naruto to be responsible for its destruction. He still had to take this mission, and he still had to die.

Well, something _had_ changed. Now he felt bitter regret at having to die so soon, and he realized that life as Naruto's lover was something he really wanted. A lot.

While Kakashi was lost in thought, Naruto had finished bandaging him. He'd tied the last knot and tucked in the ends in an attempt at neatness. His hands had hovered indecisively for a few seconds before they were drawn inexorably back to Kakashi. Now they rested lightly on his shoulders, carefully avoiding the injured areas.

"Um… You never answered my question. Is it OK if I kiss you? Kakashi-sensei?"

Hearing his own name called brought Kakashi out of his dreary thoughts.

"Yeah?"

In lieu of a response, Kakashi found himself being kissed with the infectious fervor of youth.

…..

Thirteen minutes before the meeting that would decide the fate of Konoha and Kakashi, Naruto stepped out into the street. He turned to wait for his teacher, who was still sitting on the step, pulling on his sandals. Kakashi finished, but remained seated, hands draped over his knees, as if the effort of getting to his feet was just too much. The mask was back in place, but the dark circle under his right eye showed clearly how tired he was.

Well, of course he was tired. Naruto was, too. The two of them had stayed up all night, arguing. At first, when Naruto had kissed him, Kakashi seemed to give way, but after only a minute, he cut it all short. Naruto had been afraid he was about to be rejected. He didn't doubt Kakashi cared about him in some way or other, but probably not in the way he wanted him to. He hadn't really planned on telling Kakashi that he loved him in the first place. Well, He hadn't had much of a plan at all when he showed up at Kakashi's door. He'd just needed to see Kakashi, needed to ask him that question, and then things just… got out of hand.

But what Kakashi actually said was worse than the "sorry, I don't feel that way about you" that Naruto had been expecting. What he'd said was, "Sorry, Naruto, but I stand by my decision. I'm going on the mission." As soon as Naruto's kiss-clouded mind could process what Kakashi had said, he objected. He'd decided the moment Kakashi had started spouting bullshit about not being needed anymore that there was no way in hell he was letting him go on a suicide mission, and nothing Kakashi could say now would change his mind. Unfortunately, Kakashi was every bit as stubborn, and the two remained hopelessly deadlocked. They called a temporary truce only when they realized that they had a meeting to get to, and had to somehow get Kakashi into a shirt.

So, sleep deprived, injured, and in pain, it was no surprise that Kakashi was at low ebb. Naruto stepped back into Kakashi's entryway and stretched out a hand to his teacher. Kakashi looked at the hand with an unreadable expression in his eye, but took it and let Naruto help him to his feet.

The two of them just stood there in the open doorway. Kakashi, now that he was up, was ready to get moving, but Naruto was blocking the way.

He was struck by how cold and lifeless Kakashi's hand felt in his. After a thousand pats on the head, he knew Kakashi's hands. They were supposed to be warm and comforting. Suddenly, something clicked in his head, and he finally saw what he'd failed to understand through all the hours of arguing; Kakashi didn't want to die. He'd changed his teacher's mind just enough to make him suffer as he stuck to his sense of duty.

His grip on Kakashi's hand tightened. He cursed and glared at the ground. "Kakashi-sensei, I…"

"Ahhh-ah. It's even worse than I thought." a voice drawled from somewhere outside. Naruto dropped Kakashi's hand like a hot potato, and sprang away. He looked around frantically, until he spotted Shikamaru stepping out of the shadow of a building across the way.

"This is… um… We were just…"

"Shikamaru," Kakashi cut in calmly, "Was there something you wanted to tell me? Or did you come here looking for Naruto."

"Both, actually. I thought he might come talk to you… although unless I'm reading the situation wrong," he raised an eyebrow and looked from one to the other of them, "there's even more to this than I thought."

Neither Naruto nor Kakashi said anything, and Shikamaru shrugged. "Anyway, I came to tell you two that there's a new plan. Kakashi-sensei's off the hook."

Naruto gaped and Kakashi stiffened. Finally, Naruto stammered out, "O-oi. Really? This isn't a joke, right Shikamaru?"

"No joke. Hell, what do you take me for? Why would I come all the way out here just to make a tasteless joke like that?"

A broad grin spread slowly over Naruto's face, and then immediately faded. "Shikamaru." Naruto fixed his advisor with a challenging stare. "Just so we're clear, I'm not sacrificing anyone else, either."

Shikamaru sighed and rolled his eyes. "You don't have to sacrifice anyone at all. And before you ask: No, I'm not joking this time either."

The grin reappeared with double force on Naruto's face. He covered the ground between himself and Shikamaru in a few long steps and clapped him on the shoulder with so much enthusiasm that Shikamaru nearly lost his balance. The next moment Naruto was back on the other side of the street, giving Kakashi's hand a squeeze, and before he had chance to notice that Kakashi wasn't smiling, he was bounding away, calling back over his shoulder, "ALRIGHT! Let's get to the meeting and put this plan of yours in action, Shikamaru!"

Naruto disappeared around a corner. Shikamaru started to walk after him, but Kakashi remained where he was.

"Shikamaru," he said quietly. Shikamaru stopped and half-turned. "Yesterday, you said sending me was the best option we had."

Shikamaru paused, met Kakashi's eye briefly, and looked away. "Forget what I said yesterday. The decision to use one plan or another is a cost-benefit calculation. I realized that I was miscalculating the cost. That's all there is to it."

"If you're talking about Naruto being in love with me,…" Shikamaru looked up sharply, but Kakashi continued, unabashed. "…He'd get over my death soon enough. If this new plan of yours is less likely to succeed, then please reconsider."

Shikamaru eyed the older man with a frown for a while before saying, "I dunno about that, Kakashi-sensei. Yeah, I suppose Naruto would probably survive the experience, but _get over it_…" He shook his head. "I think we both know better than that." He fished something out of his pocket and tossed it to Kakashi. Kakashi's movements were a little slow and stiff, but he managed to catch it. He opened his hand and looked down.

"Ah… Isn't this…" Kakashi looked up at Shikamaru.

"Yeah. Asuma's lighter. And when I think how much more there is between you and Naruto…"

Kakashi walked over to return the precious memento, and Shikamaru slipped it back into his pocket. "I won't lie to you. This plan's riskier. But I've decided the risk's worth taking, if it means Naruto doesn't have to go through something like that again. Besides. You saw Naruto just now, all pumped up and raring to go. No matter what happens, he'll make this work, Kakashi-sensei."

Shikamaru turned and started walking again, but stopped after a couple meters to throw a lopsided smile over his shoulder.

"Your era is over, Kakashi-sensei. It's time for you to sit back and let _Naruto_ look after _you_."

Kakashi stood stock still, long after Shikamaru was out of sight. Finally, he bowed his head and laughed.

…

The end! I hope you've enjoyed Kakashi's midlife crisis. Critique is very welcome. Something strike you as off? Please let me know.


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